The results are in...

So my PA results came in. I was selected as an alternate. I do not know how high or low on the alternate list I am. I will try to finnagle that information from the program manager here in a few weeks (I'm sure his email will be full for the next week from the other alternates wondering the same thing). I was super bummed out this morning when I read the list... a horrible sinking feeling came over me. Like nothing I've felt in a while. It was very similar to feeling like I failed miserably at something and I can't do anything about it. So what did I do?

I went and ate breakfast. A big greasy, egg, sausage, hash browns, coffee, and biscuits with gravy breakfast. Upon completion of breakfast I had come to terms with my emotional rut and am doing what I always do when things don't go my way: I figure out a way to make them go my way next time.

I am going to assume (unless I get a favorable email from the program manager) that I will not get picked up this year. I will reapply for the program next March. This Fall I will take that course that I have to. That and gaining clinical experience are the only ways to improve my application. To gain clinical experience I will find a PA at UAB's hospital to shadow and I will attempt to shadow the military PA who wrote my recommendation. If I get selected this year then the clinical experience will only help me and if I don't my application will be more competitive against the combat medics and other active duty health specialists whom I will be competing against next year.

On a side note: I don't think I've ever had as many frustrations or setbacks in any other facit of life as I have in trying to get into this program. Perhaps it will make me appreciate it a lot more when I finally get there.

Combat Rolling

No this isn't a post about rolling through the dirt in combat. I recently started kayaking and I figured I must share some things I have learned about the sport. First things first: it is scary as shit being inside a boat stuck upside down under water!!! It goes against every instinct in your body (Don't be stuck inside of something, Don't be upside down under water, Don't panic whilst being upside down under water). The first thing you have to learn when wanting to become a white water kayaker is the expensiveness of the gear which you must have:
1: PFD - Personal Flotation Device $100
2: Helmet - Preferably a composite helmet $100
3: Spray Skirt - Keeps water from filling up your boat $100
4: Paddle - anywhere from $100-300
5: Kayak - $500-1000

That's just to get started. There's all kinds of bells and whistles to buy after that (But I must admit that it's cheaper than golf) It's a lot like all outdoor sports though: expensive to start, but gear should last a while.

Now the learnin part. The next thing you learn about after the expensive gear is the "Roll". When a kayak flips over (with either a white water or touring kayak) you can't just get it to right itself by struggling to get your head above water. If you try to get your head above water without performing the proper movements with your body and paddle, you'll only be stuck upside down... under water. You have to perform a complex series of movements that involve bracing your body against the boat and snapping your hips to get the buoyancy of the boat to work in your body's favor. The last movement you must perform is keeping your head tucked down (as in away from the air above the surface) so that it keeps your body in the right position for the boat to flip back over (naturally when first trying this you try to lift your head out of the water which only forces the boat to roll back over; the head must be the last thing to exit the water). Once you can do this somewhat confidently, you are said to have a Roll. Once you perform this roll in moving current (one typically learns their roll in calm waters like a lake or pool) you are said to have a combat roll.

I have combat rolled only once. The second time I tried I was fascinated at how the different water features shook both my body and my kayak. Oh did I forget something? How, if I didn't combat roll the second time I tried, am I still here? One thing I forgot to mention was if you don't roll up, you pop your spray skirt off of the rim of the kayak and swim out of the boat. This is better than drowning but only by a little bit and here's why: once you leave the boat you leave 60-70 gallons of air keeping you at the surface of the water, this means you can get foot entrapped in the rapids or banged up on rocks, also you can lose your expensive equipment by swimming. Clearly it's another one of those extreme sport for adrenaline junkies, much like climbing ;-)

There's your kayak lesson for the day. It's about all I know so far ;-) Ideally I'll be able to update on the PA School thingy by the end of the week ;-) in an Un-Ideal world I could have to wait until August... :-/